Bismillah Ar-Rahman Ar-Rahim
Our last editions on Old-age Realities (45th/46th editions) took us across ten areas among avenues of goodness capable of ensuring better ending in life. This edition shall treat us to conflagrations of contemporary happenings and cooping with life situation having given to trans-migration tendency encapsulated in the concept 'Japaism'.
Before long, Allah (SWT) in the usual bringing man back to memory lane in a way to get him on track, recalls the creation of man from absolute nothingness. Therefrom he metamophosed into what he assumes today of himself but soon fades away sequel to some unimaginable sojourns. His would neither be an innovation nor be the end case in this manner. Allah says: "Has there not been over a man a long period of time when he was nothing - (not even) - mentioned - ? Verily We created man from a drop of mingled sperm, in order to try him: We gave him (the gifts), of hearing and sight. We showed him the way; whether he be grateful or ungrateful" (Q76:1-3). This portrays man as of clueless origin unless he grabs the way to guidance, the life may remain utterly meaningless.
In the same manner, tracing his mortal journey from cradle across equilibrium stage and consequential to old age, lots of stages impact him for either meaningfulness or meaninglessness. The Glorious Qur'an categorically declares: "We have indeed created man in the best moulds. Then do We abase him (to be) the lowest of the low (Qur'an 95:4-5).
To this end, it beholds every human to thread with caution during the charming youthfulness and buoyant economic family situation. For everyone appears oblivion of what tomorrow has in stock for him or others. So, marital home plays host to multi-dimensional challenges which determine trends of relationship curve at old age. Imperatives from this situation demands looking back and casting glance at the better days in the past to design patterns of behavior at old age when neither of the couple would be capable of much of the frivolities but resorted to heavy demands of companionship of his/her spouse.
This is the the center-point of the following line of poetry which says: فهل يرتجى لسالك غير ماله # وكل ما قدر للا نسان مفعول
meaning: "For sure, a man gets but his previous debut; even though whatever the destiny shall come to pass."
Teleologically, it is evident that the 'Japa' syndromes as occasioned between couple result in untold hardship on the left-over partner. This cuts across both gender even though it struck in the quest for economic leveraging and seeking for greener pasture. The same goes for children who do not look back on the condition of parents left behind. Making the matter worse is the situation where diaspora child snatches and whisks away a mother from aged father who had lived utterly monogamous. Yet it is equally alarming for a father to have sponsored the first wife abroad but refused to come back the trend of which the second wife jealously followed.
Rubbing aged people companionship is not only inhuman but also capable of attracting laws of retribution.
To this end, it is essential for the husband to fear Allah across marital relationship just as it is wife should as well desist from re-visiting past misdeeds on the aging husbands. Gender-balance I assume. Above all, children should consider themselves in the parents-shoe before taking steps that affect each of the parents.
The point of emphasis here is not canvassing against trans-border migration but the trauma of solitude at old age is better imagined than experienced. This calls for unfettered goodness to relatives and non-relatives as well. It brings to bear two main life episodes. In the first instance, dwellers of an Housing Estate who used to pass afternoon time on arm-chair in front of respective flats were mostly victims of loneliness resulting from wives' relocation abroad. On the other hand, an influential personality in a neighborhood died while having all his children abroad. Firstly, it took some moment before the neighbors discovered he was dead inside the mansion. Secondly, it took the CDA some tolls to decide on renovating his mansion for rent rather than becoming mysteriously desolate in the street. This is for the dint of goodness the man was recognized for while none of the children surfaced after all.
God's willing, we shall meet next week on this edition thanks for your indulgence. Till then, remain abundantly blessed. Ma 'as salaamah.
Dr. Razaq Bolawaye Uthman Imam Ansar-Ud-Deen Society Ipaja Branch Lagos State.
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